By Maryam Ogunremi
All my life, I have been close to older generations and I grew up around them. From my grandparents to my mother, neighbours – back when I was staying with my mother in a face-to-face apartment – to people living in our area along Aiyetoro road in Abeokuta, the Ogun State capital.
And through them, I have learnt a lot of Yoruba sayings and some general sayings that have enriched my life. Though, there are a few that I really don’t agree with and the one at the centre of this article is one of those. Don’t get me wrong, I am not saying the experiences that led to the emergence of these sayings are not valid. They are valid and profound.
“The devil you know is better than an angel you don’t know,” This saying has shaped and marred lives. Some have been saved by this saying and some have missed out on great opportunities because they are scared of the angel they don’t know. Scary, right?
Let’s start with the devil you know. I love the fact that the saying did not say, the devil you live with because you can live with someone and not know them. For you to know that ‘devil’, you have taken your time to study him/her. His/her likes, what he/she stands for and whatnot. You have, over the years, understood how to approach that ‘devil’ on different occasions. You know what every one of his/her moves or looks stands for. You know how to present every situation and how not to present your case before him/her.
Knowing someone takes effort and over the years, you have put in that effort to know this devil. You have made lots of sacrifices because if you don’t, that ‘devil’ cannot be appeased and you need them to be to make headway. This knowing makes you feel comfortable sticking with the devil. Fantastic strategy, I must say.
There’s also the part where you had to work on yourself feeling comfortable with the actions and inaction of that ‘devil.’ Just like the frog keeps adapting to the temperature of the hot water until its death – just like Nigerians are adapting to almost all temperatures of economic hardship.
Now, let’s talk about this ‘angel.’ The saint who is coming from nowhere. The saint coming to save you from whatever hell that ‘devil’ has put you in or is putting you through. This one you don’t know. You don’t know anything about him/her. In fact, nobody has given you any information about him/her.
He/she just shows up, unannounced, with the right words, action and energy that makes you feel like the whole world is yours to have. An hour with this angel, feels like a decade because he/she has been able to address fifty percent of your worries and made you forget you have a devil somewhere lurking to end your life with worries and troubles. Awesome, right?
At this rate, the natural you wants to go with the angel. This is different from what you have been feeling over time. The one-hour relief is more than enough to convince you that this angel will do right by you than the devil you have been sticking with. You really want to give it all up and run into the peaceful embrace of the angel.
But then, you remember this saying, “the devil you know is better than the angel you don’t know.” So, you took a pause on your decision. You started imagining the likely ‘shege’ your eyes will see if this angel is nothing short of a pretender. Also, the people you have around you kept telling you that sticking with your devil is more comforting than going after this unknown angel. So you stay with your devil.
This brought me to where I am going. Have you ever thought deeply about this saying? You took your time to know the devil. You took your time to know the one who has been tormenting you, but you don’t want to take your time to know the one who is willing to make your life easier.
You were so much in a hurry to believe that this angel is not a saint as you convince yourself with the thought that, “they’re all the same!” And year-in-year-out, you keep wallowing in your sorry state all because you felt that knowing the devil will save you and you have nothing to lose if you choose not to know the angel.
This mindset has led our lives for years. It has brought us to where we are at the moment as a people. “Omo wa ni, e je ko se” – he is our child, let him do it – has brought us to this current economic situation. Just because we know him/her does not mean he/she will favour us.
He has completed his first term and things are not going quite well, but we felt, “Who else do you know that can do it better?” “Let him continue. He is the devil we know.” And just like that, we keep sticking with the devils and the angels keep slipping through our fingers. The fact that you know the devil, does not mean that he/she will favour you.
We make the same mistakes over and over again. In marriage, business, politics and social lives. We keep sticking with the bad eggs and we don’t see anything wrong because they are the devil we know.
Now, all you do is count days and weeks as they turn into years with the hope that things will change for the better. At this point, you are hoping you will have another shot at another angel, but the ship has sailed. YOU CAN ONLY RENEW HOPE WHERE THERE IS AN EXISTENCE OF ONE.
Maryam Ogunremi is a broadcaster, writes from Abeokuta
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