A Nigerian cleric, Pastor Dolapo Adelakun, has cautioned women against trying to “own” their husbands or holding tightly to relationships at the expense of their peace of mind.
Adelakun, who shared the message on her Facebook page, said the Holy Spirit taught her that women should only hold firmly to their faith in God and self-love, warning that every other attachment in life could be shaken or lost.
She narrated how the lesson came alive during a visit to a psychiatric hospital, where she was invited to pray for a relative.
According to her, the female ward was overcrowded with women battling mental health crises linked to marital and family problems.
“I was shocked to see young and old women, all broken because of men or family issues. Some were abandoned by fiancés, others depressed after losing children, while some suffered after their husbands took second wives or died unexpectedly,” she wrote.
In contrast, the male ward, she noted, had only four patients — three of whom were admitted over drug abuse, while the fourth suffered a breakdown after losing a high-paying job.
The pastor said the experience reinforced the Holy Spirit’s message that women should not anchor their sanity and self-worth on husbands, children, or possessions.
“Do not own anything that can be taken away from you,” Adelakun advised. “When you lose your mind, you lose everything. Women must guard their peace by holding on only to two assets — their faith in God and their love for themselves.”
She warned that the pressures of marriage and family could drive women into depression if they failed to prioritise their mental health.
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